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Showing posts from December, 2016

3 SQL databases walked into a NoSQL bar

3 SQL databases walked into a NoSQL bar. A little while later, they walked out because they couldn't find a table.

Infinitely many mathematicians walk into a bar

Infinitely many mathematicians walk into a bar. The first says, “I’ll have a beer.” The second says, “I’ll have half a beer.” The third says, “I’ll have a quarter of a beer.” Before anyone else can speak, the barman fills up exactly two glasses of beer and serves them. “Come on, now,” he says to the group, “You guys have got to learn your limits.”

An amnesiac walks into a bar...

An amnesiac walks into a bar and asks, "Do I come here often?"

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer...

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. He looks around and notices that there are big chunks of meat hanging from the ceiling. Puzzled, he asks the bartender, "Why have you got all this meat hanging around?" The barman says, "It's a little bet we have running. If you can jump up and grab a bit of meat in your mouth, then you can drink for free. If you fail, then you have to buy everyone else in the bar a round. Are you going to try?" The man shakes his head and replies, "No, the steaks are too high."

A dyslexic...

A dyslexic walks into a bra...

A grasshopper walks into a bar...

A grasshopper walks into a bar, and the bartender says: "Hey, we've got a drink named after you!", to which the grasshopper replied: "Why would anyone name a drink Bob?"

Two jumper cables walk into a bar...

Two jumper cables walk into a bar. The bartender says, "You guys'd better not start anything in here..."